By Lynn Moncus: QCS columnist
I, Aggie am writing this column because the slave claims to have frost bitten hands and says her cold fingers won’t work on this computer. Well, I think her mind is iced over also as she has been trying to tell me that Santa Claus won’t be coming this year.
She knows this is my favorite time of year and that I know that each package she brings home is for me. Because I tend to go through every sack very carefully, she really shouldn’t leave one within reach if she doesn’t want me to check all contents.
One day, while she was putting items away, I just happened to stick my nose into the big sack right in front of me and couldn’t keep from biting a beautiful squeaky toy. When she heard that noise, she yelled at me, grabbed the toy, and hid it, saying I really hadn’t seen, smelled, or heard anything.
Well, I know what I had in my mouth and am now wondering where she put it. Surely, she didn’t throw it away. I’d know if she had because I have been through the trash every day in order to be sure. I’ve also looked in her usual hiding places, but I haven’t been able to open a couple of doors and have a feeling she put it away safely so she can surprise me with it Christmas morning.
I’ve even tried to be especially nice to the slave so she will let Santa come down the chimney. He always comes some time on Christmas Eve while I’m asleep and leaves all sorts of wonderful toys and treats. He knows I am particularly fond of squeaky toys because I can get plenty of attention from the slave when I chew on them, especially when she is watching one of her favorite TV shows or is talking on the phone. She even plays with me sometimes and throws them so I can catch them on the fly.
I really wish she would give me all my treats when we open the packages, but she becomes very stingy and tries to make me think I would get sick were I to eat all of them. As a result, she makes them last for at least a month by giving me one little goody at a time.
If she can eat a whole box of chocolates in a couple of evenings, why can’t I eat all my chicken jerky at once? She even substitutes some of my kibbles at times when she should be giving me a tasty chunk of rawhide. Maybe I should stay up long enough on Christmas Eve to talk to Santa about my problems to see if he couldn’t convince her to quit being so frugal. He might even leave me more gifts were I to do that and might be convinced to leave her fewer.
The last time she brought in some sacks after a shopping spree,
I noticed she took two of them to the book room and put them into the closet. If I could just figure out how to turn that door knob, I could do some serious checking and could even play with a few toys while she is out drinking coffee. Of course, I’d have to be careful to return them before she gets home.
What if I were to open some treats and eat a few? Do you suppose she would notice that? I guess I had better leave everything alone so she can add those presents to the ones Santa brings.
I surely hope all of you are enjoying Christmas season as much as I am and that you will be sure to write Santa notes for all your pets. You might even include a few milk bones with the cookies you leave him so he can take them to other pets who need special attention. Let’s all just think good thoughts during the rest of the season and be especially kind to each other all year long.