When misery loves company

Most people likely know the phrase, “misery loves company,” because it’s been used in various forms since at least 400 B.C. I’ve always understood the term meant that when someone is depressed for any reason, they want to be around others who also are at a low point for mutual consolation, which is one of the definitions I found online for it.

An example given was that two friends had just broken up with their boyfriends, so they decided to go to a movie together. But I also found that it could mean that we want others to be miserable also (e.g., “if I’m not happy, no one’s going to be happy.”

The Bible gives many causes of misery, including oppression by others (Exodus 3:7-10), sickness or pending death (Mark 5:25-26; 2 Kings 20:1-3), loss of a loved one (John 11:17-19), trying to gain fortune (1 Timothy 6:6-9) and loss of fortune (Matthew 19:21-22). But sin is the most common cause of misery in this life and through separation from God for eternity (Genesis 3:1-24; Romans 3:10-18, 23; 6:23).

Another reason misery loves company is those miserable in sin want justification for their sinful actions (Romans 1:18-32). They comfort themselves by encouraging others to sin, thinking they shouldn’t have to suffer for their sins because everyone sins and seems to get away with it (Psalm 73:2-13; Proverbs 1:10-19).

Sharing our low points for mutual consolation is appropriate for Christians to seek and supply (Galatians 6:2; Romans 12:9-16; Ephesians 4:32; Colossians 3:12; 1 Peter 3:8). We’re to comfort each other because God comforts us; that’s one reason he comforts us (Isaiah 51:12-16; 2 Corinthians 1:3-11; 7:4-7; Philippians 2:1-5).

Because we all sin and need comfort when misery befalls us, we mustn’t not look judgingly on others when misery befalls them, whatever the cause, because that just adds to the misery (Obadiah 1:11-15; Matthew 7:1-5; Job 16:1-5). Sometimes the best comfort is simply a silent presence (Job 2:11-13). Nonetheless, a rebuke may need to come after the misery is alleviated and if we’re inappropriately judgmental, a rebuke may come to us as well (Job 38:1 to 42:9).

Whenever someone sins and repents, God removes the misery of their sin — that is, the guilt and ultimate eternal punishment, although they may still have to suffer the consequences while on earth (1 John 1:5-9; Isaiah 40:1-2; 1 Corinthians 3:10-15; Judges 10:6-16; 2 Samuel 12:7-14; Revelation 20:11-15; 21:1-5; 2 Corinthians 7:10).

So, rather than seeking comfort elsewhere when we’re miserable or when we see others in misery, our first thought should be to seek God and his people for comfort (Zechariah 10:1-2; Hosea 5:13 to 6:3; Acts 3:19-20; 2:38-39; Isaiah 49:13; Psalm 23; 30:1-5; Matthew 5:3-4, 7).

Do you rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn? That’s a Godly trait he expects us to exhibit! We’re to accept others as we want to be accepted and rejoice in their repentance (Matthew 7:12; Romans 15:1-5; Luke 15:11-32, 1-10).

My next article, likely to appear on Sept. 29 in the Quay County Sun, will discuss when misery doesn’t want company.

Leonard Lauriault is a member of the Church of Christ in Logan who writes about faith for the Quay County Sun. Contact him at [email protected].